You are who you surround yourself with. It’s an age-old truth that is also confirmed by numerous studies.
Both ancient philosophers and modern authors and psychologists agree on the impact other people have on our lives.
Let’s talk about it in more detail and discuss the reasons this saying is true. We will also list a few quotes on the topic.
6 Reasons You Are Who You Surround Yourself With
1. How others treat you affects your self-esteem
Whether we realize it or not, what other people say and how they treat us has an impact on the way we feel about ourselves.
For example, if you have a friend who always criticizes you or makes condescending remarks, at some point you may start to question yourself.
Why do I always do everything wrong? Why am I that incapable?
Even when you are a grownup, the presence of judgmental and disrespectful people can take a toll on your self-esteem. That’s one of the reasons why you need to be careful about who you surround yourself with.
Studies demonstrate the link between verbal abuse and damaged self-worth. At the same time, supportive connections with others are associated with improved self-esteem.
2. What you discuss with those around you matters for your growth
What do you typically talk about with your friends? It’s more important than you think. The conversations you have with others have a huge effect on your personal growth.
Say that you hang out with people who only talk about gossip and day-to-day stuff. Do you learn anything from them? Do their words make you think? Does what you discuss today have any impact on the person you will become in five years?
Not really. Such conversations aim only to kill your time. People who love gossip and pointless chitchat don’t bring any quality to your life. You don’t learn, think, or grow in their company.
On the contrary, when your friends talk about life, the world, and other deeper topics, they give you food for thought. You may not agree on everything, but it’s certain that your friends’ ideas will make you think.
Surrounding yourself with people who think deeply about life, therefore, gives a boost to your own personal growth. Moreover, one study found the link between meaningful conversations and greater life satisfaction.
3. Other people’s emotional states affect your mood
Empathy is in our nature. Whether we want it or not, the energy other people give off has a great impact on the way we feel. When I say energy, I’m talking about a person’s emotional state and overall attitude.
We all have met people who bring others down. This may be someone who is too negative or bitter. Maybe they complain all the time, start arguments out of nothing, or always find a nasty thing to say.
Whatever it is, it affects us emotionally. When you surround yourself with people who thrive on bitterness, anger, or misery, their negative emotions have the power to alter your mood. Emotions are contagious, and studies confirm it.
That’s why you feel dull after talking to that friend who always complains about something. And that’s the reason you feel annoyed with everyone after dealing with that high-conflict person at work.
The fact that emotions are contagious is one of the key reasons you are who you surround yourself with.
4. Some people fill you with energy, others drain you
You may have noticed that hanging out with different people has a different effect on your energy levels.
When you enjoy someone’s company, have fun, and make engaging conversations, you feel a boost of energy. The same happens when you spend time with positive and easygoing friends, especially when you share a deep connection. You can be yourself, so you feel relaxed and happy.
On the contrary, the presence of someone else may feel draining. For example, this can be due to the fact that this person talks about themselves all the time, acts pushy, or speaks ill of others. You feel empty after spending time with them.
Therefore, the people around you either boost or waste your energy resources. That’s one more reason to be selective about your social connections.
5. You unintentionally pick up others’ habits, behaviors, and traits
Just as other people’s emotions are contagious, so are their behaviors and habits. Research demonstrates this. For example, one study found that unhealthy behaviors spread in a similar way to infectious diseases!
Once again, the reason lies in empathy and our natural need for belonging. We pick up others’ behaviors and habits because we are wired to want to be a part of a group. So, we blend in with our peers by mimicking their ways of doing things.
In psychology, it’s called the chameleon effect, and it happens subconsciously. Now you understand why you are who you surround yourself with!
6. Others’ opinions and values have an impact on what you believe
Studies show that friendships have the power to alter your political beliefs. It happens through conversations—if you don’t have a solid opinion about a topic, you tend to agree with your friend who has a deeper knowledge of it.
As a result, you may unconsciously adopt their opinion. Sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s not.
It’s great when your friends make you reconsider certain things you thought were set in stone. In essence, they make you familiar with an alternative point of view. This promotes open-mindedness and big picture thinking.
But sometimes other people impose their views on you. If you are a naturally suggestible person, you may adopt their opinion without giving it much thought. That’s why it’s important to be picky about the people you surround yourself with.
You Are Who You Surround Yourself With Quotes
1. Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are.
2. The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you, whose presence calls forth your best.
3. The choices you make now, the people you surround yourself with, they all have the potential to affect your life, even who you are, forever.
4. You are the sum of who you surround yourself with.
5. The people you surround yourself with are an extension of your energy, your beliefs, and your goals. It’s okay to be selective.
6. Understand that you will be like those with whom you surround yourself. Your environment is stronger than you are.
7. The people you surround yourself with influence your behaviors, so choose friends who have healthy habits.
8. You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
9. You become what you surround yourself with. Energies are contagious. Choose carefully. Your environment becomes you.
10. We become what we contemplate.
11. Who you spend time with is who you become. Change your life by consciously choosing to surround yourself with people with higher standards.
12. Surround yourself with people who make you hungry for life, touch your heart, and nourish your soul.
13. Surround yourself with people, color, sounds, and work that nourish you.
14. The better you are at surrounding yourself with people of high potential, the greater your chance for success.
-John C. Maxwell
15. The people in your life with either inspire or drain you. Choose carefully.
16. Surround yourself with people that reflect who you want to be and how you want to feel. Energies are contagious.
17. You are only going to be as good as the people you surround yourself with, so be brave enough to let go of those who keep weighing you down.
18. Surround yourself with people who can make you better.
19. In your day, surround yourself with people who love you, motivate you, encourage you, and just make you feel good about being you.
20. If you surround yourself with people who possess no vision, soon enough, you’ll be blind.
21. You will rarely make wise decisions if you surround yourself with fools.
22. Always surround yourself with people who lift you up rather than hold you down.
-Donald L. Hicks
23. You are a product of your environment. Surround yourself with the best.
24. Surround yourself with the dreamers, and the doers, the believers, and thinkers, but most of all, surround yourself with those who see the greatness within you, even when you don’t see it yourself.
25. Surround yourself with people who have dreams, desire, and ambition; they’ll help you push for and realize your own.
To sum up, not only quotes, but also scientific studies show that you are who you surround yourself with. So, always keep this fact in mind and make sure you pick your social connections wisely!
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