{"id":713,"date":"2021-12-09T11:40:40","date_gmt":"2021-12-09T11:40:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/?p=713"},"modified":"2021-12-09T11:41:20","modified_gmt":"2021-12-09T11:41:20","slug":"socially-selective-person-signs","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/","title":{"rendered":"8 Signs You Are a Socially Selective Person &#038; Why It\u2019s Great to Be One"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Maybe you\u2019ve been told that you are too demanding toward other people. Or that you are a recluse, <a href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/signs-of-a-loner\/\">a loner<\/a>, an antisocial type. But what if you are just a socially selective person? Let\u2019s talk about this personality trait and explain why it\u2019s great to have it.<\/p>\n<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_64 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title \" >Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #222222;color:#222222\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #222222;color:#222222\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#What_does_socially_selective_mean\" title=\"What does socially selective mean?\">What does socially selective mean?<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#8_signs_of_a_socially_selective_person\" title=\"8 signs of a socially selective person\">8 signs of a socially selective person<\/a><ul class='ez-toc-list-level-3' ><li class='ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#1_You_dont_have_many_friends\" title=\"1. You don\u2019t have many friends\">1. You don\u2019t have many friends<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#2_You_dont_make_friends_easily\" title=\"2. You don\u2019t make friends easily\">2. You don\u2019t make friends easily<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#3_Your_friendships_are_deep_and_meaningful\" title=\"3. Your friendships are deep and meaningful\">3. Your friendships are deep and meaningful<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-6\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#4_Socializing_with_random_people_seems_like_a_waste_of_time\" title=\"4. Socializing with random people seems like a waste of time\">4. Socializing with random people seems like a waste of time<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-7\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#5_You_value_your_inner_peace\" title=\"5. You value your inner peace\">5. You value your inner peace<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-8\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#6_You_dont_feel_the_need_to_be_social_all_the_time\" title=\"6. You don\u2019t feel the need to be social all the time\">6. You don\u2019t feel the need to be social all the time<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-9\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#7_You_see_no_sense_in_hanging_out_with_people_you_dont_resonate_with\" title=\"7. You see no sense in hanging out with people you don\u2019t resonate with\">7. You see no sense in hanging out with people you don\u2019t resonate with<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-10\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#8_You_are_good_at_reading_people\" title=\"8. You are good at reading people\">8. You are good at reading people<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-11\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/#Why_being_socially_selective_is_a_great_quality\" title=\"Why being socially selective is a great quality\">Why being socially selective is a great quality<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"What_does_socially_selective_mean\"><\/span>What does socially selective mean?<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p>It means to be picky when it comes to one\u2019s social circle and to intentionally keep it small. It describes someone who chooses their friends carefully and <a href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/mind\/you-are-who-you-hang-out-with\/\">hangs out only with those people<\/a> who make them happy and bring meaning to their life.<\/p>\n<p>However, it\u2019s not necessarily a synonym for being reserved and introverted. In essence, not all socially selective people are introverts, but most introverts tend to be socially selective.<\/p>\n<p>Moreover, many people \u2013 both introverts and extroverts \u2013 become pickier about their social connections as they grow older.<\/p>\n<p>So, are you this kind of person? Let\u2019s look through the traits and behaviors associated with social selectivity.<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"8_signs_of_a_socially_selective_person\"><\/span>8 signs of a socially selective person<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1_You_dont_have_many_friends\"><\/span>1. You don\u2019t have many friends<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>The most telling sign of a person who is picky about their social circle is that they <a href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/communication\/why-do-i-have-no-friends\/\">don\u2019t have many friends<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>If it\u2019s you, then you probably have only a few good friends. But these people have been by your side for years and you are certain that you can trust them.<\/p>\n<p>You see no sense in maintaining superficial friendships. So it\u2019s your choice to keep your social circle small but of high quality.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2_You_dont_make_friends_easily\"><\/span>2. You don\u2019t make friends easily<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>You also don\u2019t easily bond with people. Nor do you open up to others if you don\u2019t know them well enough. You tend to be cautious with new people.<\/p>\n<p>You want to <a href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/communication\/questions-to-ask-someone-you-just-met\/\">get to know someone on a deep level<\/a> and in different life situations before you can call them a friend.<\/p>\n<p>You are pretty happy with your small circle, so you feel no need to expand it. Being socially selective doesn\u2019t mean being a recluse and isolating yourself from society. However, it could mean that you don\u2019t seek opportunities to meet new people.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3_Your_friendships_are_deep_and_meaningful\"><\/span>3. Your friendships are deep and meaningful<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>You may not have many friends, but those few people you surround yourself with are reliable and loyal. They also have similar passions and goals in life, so you feel like you can be yourself in their company.<\/p>\n<p>You seek to form meaningful bonds with other people, not superficial connections. Maybe you enjoy deep conversations with your friends. Or you like doing interesting activities together such as hiking or traveling.<\/p>\n<p>Whatever you prefer, it all boils down to the fact that you seek to engage with other people in more meaningful ways.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"4_Socializing_with_random_people_seems_like_a_waste_of_time\"><\/span>4. Socializing with random people seems like a waste of time<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>You see no sense in joking around in the company of random people. Yes, it could be that you used to like it when you were younger \u2013 especially if you are an extrovert. Big groups, loud gatherings, parties all night \u2013 we\u2019ve all been there.<\/p>\n<p>But you no longer enjoy this stuff. Socializing with people you have nothing in common with doesn\u2019t make any sense anymore. It feels like a waste of time. You\u2019d rather stay in and spend time with your family or on your own.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5_You_value_your_inner_peace\"><\/span>5. You value your inner peace<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>All the above traits have to do with the fact that socially selective people seek to protect their inner peace.<\/p>\n<p>Whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, sometimes you feel like too much contact with other people drains you. Like they disturb your inner calm.<\/p>\n<p>You may say that this sounds <a href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/signs-of-an-introvert\/\">more like an introvert<\/a>, but extroverts can feel this way too as they grow older.<\/p>\n<p>They may take more time to become socially selective than the quiet ones, but ultimately, they too reach the point where they no longer have the energy to maintain meaningless connections. This is when they devote themselves to their families and close friends.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"6_You_dont_feel_the_need_to_be_social_all_the_time\"><\/span>6. You don\u2019t feel the need to be social all the time<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>A person who is choosy about their social connections is emotionally self-reliant. It means that they are comfortable in their own company and have activities and passions to entertain themselves.<\/p>\n<p>Therefore, you don\u2019t feel the need to be social all the time. You are pretty happy with staying in on a Saturday night. You have no problem to celebrate Christmas with your family alone instead of going to a fancy party.<\/p>\n<p>Of course, it doesn\u2019t mean that you don\u2019t enjoy social activities at all. But you just don\u2019t need to go out and socialize with other people all the time.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"7_You_see_no_sense_in_hanging_out_with_people_you_dont_resonate_with\"><\/span>7. You see no sense in hanging out with people you don\u2019t resonate with<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>When we are younger, we tend to be slow to figure out whether we are in the right company or not. It\u2019s because we don\u2019t really care \u2013 we just want to have a good time and experience life to its fullest.<\/p>\n<p>But as you grow older, you realize that there are people you resonate with and those who don\u2019t really bring anything valuable to your life.<\/p>\n<p>When you become socially selective, you see no point in hanging out with such people. If all you can discuss with them is gossip and small talk, you prefer to do without them.<\/p>\n<p>The same is true for the individuals in your life who make you feel uncomfortable. For example, <a href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/communication\/signs-your-friend-doesnt-respect-you\/\">friends who don\u2019t respect your personal boundaries<\/a> or overly critical relatives who make you feel insignificant.<\/p>\n<p>As a socially selective person, you choose to <a href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/communication\/signs-you-should-stay-away-from-someone\/\">distance yourself from people<\/a> like that.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"8_You_are_good_at_reading_people\"><\/span>8. You are good at reading people<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>Being picky about your social circle also means being quick enough to recognize <a href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/communication\/why-do-i-feel-like-i-dont-belong-anywhere\/\">who belongs in it<\/a> and who doesn\u2019t.<\/p>\n<p>You are quite good at reading people \u2013 either because you are an intuitive person and it\u2019s your innate quality or it\u2019s a skill developed from experience. You are highly observant and quick to understand what kind of person is in front of you.<\/p>\n<p>This way, you soon figure out if someone you just met is a decent human being or is not what they seem. This is how you know if there is any point in getting to know them further.<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Why_being_socially_selective_is_a_great_quality\"><\/span>Why being socially selective is a great quality<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p>Now you see that there is nothing wrong with being picky about your social connections. Moreover, this quality offers a lot of benefits.<\/p>\n<p>You don\u2019t waste time on the wrong people or pointless social activities. You know that you surround yourself only with trustworthy, like-minded individuals who add value to your life and <a href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/communication\/feeling-disappointed-in-people\/\">won\u2019t let you down<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Therefore, you form more meaningful bonds with others. And this ultimately <a href=\"https:\/\/link.springer.com\/article\/10.1007\/s10902-006-9025-2\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">translates into<\/a> greater happiness and life satisfaction. So, in the end, socially selective people are happier people!<\/p>\n<p>Thus, the next time someone accuses you of <a href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/antisocial-vs-introverted-difference\/\">being antisocial<\/a>, cite a popular meme:<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m not antisocial. I\u2019m selectively social.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-714\" src=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/selectivelysocial.jpg\" alt=\"I\u2019m not antisocial. I\u2019m selectively social.\" width=\"800\" height=\"800\" srcset=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/selectivelysocial.jpg 800w, https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/selectivelysocial-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/selectivelysocial-150x150.jpg 150w, https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/selectivelysocial-768x768.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Maybe you\u2019ve been told that you are too demanding toward other people. Or that you are a recluse, a loner, an antisocial type. But what if you are just a socially selective person? Let\u2019s talk about this personality trait and explain why it\u2019s great to have it. What does socially selective mean? It means to &#8230; <a title=\"8 Signs You Are a Socially Selective Person &#038; Why It\u2019s Great to Be One\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/personality\/socially-selective-person-signs\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about 8 Signs You Are a Socially Selective Person &#038; Why It\u2019s Great to Be One\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":715,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[25],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/713"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=713"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/713\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":716,"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/713\/revisions\/716"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/715"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=713"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=713"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/powerofmisfits.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=713"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}