Sadly, genuine friendships are becoming increasingly rare in today’s world. It seems that the consumer mindset has distorted our view of things but also the way we treat other people.
So the question is: how do you know if your friends are true and loyal? There are a few indicators that betray a lack of genuine interest in a friendly relationship. Check the below signs your friend doesn’t care about you.
If someone you hang out with fits the bill, then most likely, he or she either takes advantage of you or is just a random passer-by in your life. In either case, this person is not your true friend.
8 Surefire Signs Your Friend Doesn’t Care about You
1. They don’t listen to you
Probably the most important sign that your friend doesn’t really care about you is that they are not willing to listen.
If you have a personal problem and decide to share it with your friend, how do they respond?
Do they carefully listen to you, trying to get to the root of the issue and offer advice? Or do they reply with indifferent remarks and quickly switch the focus of the conversation to themselves?
Of course, your friend may happen to have a tough time and be concerned with their own struggles. But if they always want to talk only about themselves, it’s a huge sign that a person you consider your friend doesn’t care about you.
2. They are unwilling to offer help and support when you need it
Another red flag is that your friend is not there for you when you need them. Whatever it is that you are expecting from them – be it tangible help or emotional support – they always seem to slip away.
They may give you excuses or simply disappear. They don’t pick up the phone and don’t reply to your texts just to say later that they were super busy. Once again, if this happens once or twice, it may indeed be that your friend is overloaded with work or has family issues.
But if they are never available to offer you help and support, you should reconsider the nature of this friendship.
3. They just disappear when you have a hard time
A fake friend will be beside you only in moments of joy. As soon as adversities knock at your door, they will simply disappear and enter your life only when things are calm again.
Do you have a friend who is the first to accept your invitation to a party and the last to call you when you are ill? If someone in your social circle seems to withdraw every time you are in trouble, it’s a good idea to question their role in your life.
The same is true when conflict arises and you call out your friend for something they did. A fake friend won’t confront you or try to explain themselves. Since they don’t care about you, they will just disappear and wait until you calm down. After some time, they will pop up at the horizon as if nothing had happened.
Keep in mind that a genuine friend cares to resolve disagreements with you because they appreciate you and the connection you have.
4. They don’t know the real you
Does your friend know what your aspirations and values in life are? What you dream about and what you are afraid of most of all? Do they know what makes your heart beat faster and gives you a sense of meaning?
If someone you hang out with doesn’t know the answers to these questions and all your conversations revolve around meaningless stuff, it’s another one of the signs your friend doesn’t care about you.
Why? Because a true friend wants to get to know your authentic innermost self. When you open your heart to them, they are listening. And this is why genuine friends know who you really are.
5. They are using you
Is your friend constantly asking for favors? Do they always seem to need something? And most importantly, do they never reciprocate your effort and willingness to help? If so, it could be that they are simply taking advantage of you.
We often form temporary friendships with other people just because we share the same social setting. For example, you can make friends at work, but they disappear from your life as soon as you decide to change your job.
Such temporary friends often use you for their own purposes. For example, a co-worker who repeatedly asks for your help with a report or a college friend who turns to you when she is having a hard time with a math assignment.
In reality, these people don’t care about you and are not your friends at all – they just find you convenient.
6. They are not happy for you
Another one of the surefire signs your friend doesn’t care about you is that they are not happy for you. When you accomplish something and share your joy with them, they feel envious and bitter.
It may show in the backhanded compliments and deprecating questions. Pay attention to how your friend reacts when you share good news with them.
Do they always seem to find something negative to say? Do they belittle your joy with critical questions and remarks? Does your friend get passive-aggressive and try to make you feel bad about being happier or more successful than they are?
All these are huge red flags that betray a fake friend who doesn’t really care about you.
7. They don’t accept you for who you are
Disagreements and misunderstandings are inevitable in all kinds of relationships, both romantic and friendly ones. But the core of a genuine connection is accepting another person for who they are.
If your friend laughs at your dreams or criticizes you harshly for your choices and beliefs, it could be a sign that they don’t care about you. If they don’t even care to understand your concerns, views, and aspirations, it means that they don’t accept you for who you are.
As a result, you will have to hide parts of yourself from the person you consider to be your friend. But the truth is that a genuine friend wants to at least try to understand and accept you even if they don’t agree with you.
8. They don’t have time for you
We all are adults with our responsibilities and hectic lifestyles, but it doesn’t change the fact that we find time for the people we care about.
No matter how busy someone is, they do have time for those they are truly interested in. More precisely, they make time for them. If your friend doesn’t show up and puts down one invitation after another, it’s a telling sign he or she doesn’t care about you.
Do you always call and text them first? Are you always the one to offer to meet? If you are the only one to take initiative in a friendship while the other person is always busy, they may not be your friend at all.
These are the key signs your friend doesn’t care about you. If the above descriptions ring true for someone you hang out with, I urge you to reconsider their role in your life. Sometimes fake friends are not easy to spot, but they do show their real faces sooner or later, especially if you pay attention.
